Epi #138. How I Transformed My Twins' Behaviors Without Crushing Their Spirit. (One is Autistic)
Nov 12, 2024
Have you ever felt torn between disciplining your child and nurturing their unique spirit?
I certainly have. As a mom of energetic 8-year-old twins, one of whom is on the autism spectrum, I've faced challenges that tested my patience and understanding.
One afternoon, my autistic son, Santi, wanted to play with his twin brother, Alex.
Santi struggles with understanding social cues.
He approached Alex eagerly, but Alex wasn't in the mood to play. Alex tried to move away, giving subtle hints that he needed space.
Santi didn't pick up on these cues and kept getting closer. Frustrated, Alex eventually pushed Santi, who started crying.
When I found Santi in tears, a typical reaction might have been to scold Alex for pushing. But I realized that wouldn't solve the underlying issue.
I took a deep breath and remained impartial. I comforted Santi and asked both boys to calm down. Instead of jumping to conclusions, I wanted to understand both sides.
Once they were calmer, I learned that Santi didn't realize Alex needed space, and Alex didn't know how to express his feelings assertively. They both needed help communicating.
I helped Santi understand body language by explaining, "When Alex steps back or says 'stop,' he needs some space." I encouraged Alex to use his words: "Next time, try saying, 'I need some time alone right now, please.'"
I faced thoughts like, "Shouldn't they know how to handle this?" But I reminded myself that children are still learning. It's our role to guide them.
By addressing their individual needs and teaching them how to communicate, the boys began to handle conflicts better. They felt understood and supported, and our home became more peaceful.
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โ Overcome Angry Reactions: Learn to respond calmly during your children's chaos.
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Remember, by approaching situations with empathy and understanding, you can turn challenging moments into opportunities for growth. You're not alone, and I'm here to support you every step of the way.
