Epi #154. How to Have an EASY Routine with your Picky Child

Does Every Little Thing Feel Like a Battle?

You wake up, ready to start the day. You just need your child to get dressed, eat breakfast, and brush their teeth.

But the socks feel too scratchy. The cereal is “too crunchy.” And brushing their teeth? Forget it.

It’s a full-on meltdown before 8 AM.

If you’re thinking, “Why is everything so hard?” you’re not alone. I’ve been there. And so have thousands of parents I’ve worked with.

Good news? There’s a reason for your child’s pickiness. And once you understand it, daily routines become so much easier—with fewer battles and more cooperation.

In this article, I’ll break down:

✅ Why your child is so picky and sensitive to everyday things.
✅ The real reason behind their resistance (hint: it’s not defiance).
✅ A step-by-step plan to help them—and you—have a smoother daily routine.

Let’s get into it.

Why Is My Child So Picky?

Your child isn’t trying to be difficult.

They’re not throwing fits just to push your buttons.

They have sensory needs—and those needs make everyday activities overwhelming for them.

Think about it this way: Imagine walking into a room where the lights are painfully bright, the music is blasting, your clothes feel itchy, and someone keeps spraying a strong perfume right in your face.

Wouldn’t you feel stressed? Wouldn’t you want to run?

That’s how daily life can feel for kids who are highly sensitive.

Some kids feel things more intensely than others. And that intensity makes normal activities—like brushing teeth, eating, or getting dressed—harder for them.

The 7 Senses That Affect Daily Routines

Most people know about five senses (sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell). But did you know there are seven?

Here’s how each one can affect your child’s daily routine:

1. Auditory (Hearing Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Covers ears when there’s loud noise.
• Melts down in noisy places.
• Gets easily overwhelmed by multiple sounds at once.

🎯 How to help:

• Use noise-canceling headphones in loud spaces.
• Give them quiet breaks in between activities.
• Use a soft, calm voice when giving directions.

2. Visual (Light Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Avoids bright lights.
• Gets overwhelmed in busy, colorful places.
• Struggles with sudden light changes.

🎯 How to help:

• Let them wear sunglasses or hats outside.
• Keep room lighting soft (avoid bright white lights).
• Use visual schedules to help them predict what’s next.

3. Tactile (Touch Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Hates certain fabrics (tags, seams, scratchy materials).
• Struggles with brushing teeth, washing hands, or combing hair.
• Refuses hugs or pulls away from touch.

🎯 How to help:

• Let them pick their own clothes (soft fabrics, no tags).
• Use a soft-bristled toothbrush and gentle hairbrush.
• Let them wash their hands with a wet wipe instead of running water if needed.

4. Oral (Taste & Texture Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Picky eating (only eats certain foods).
• Gags at certain textures.
• Avoids trying new foods.

🎯 How to help:

• Offer safe foods while slowly introducing new ones.
• Let them play with food (touch, smell, explore).
• Don’t force bites—let them take control of eating.

5. Olfactory (Smell Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Covers nose often.
• Avoids certain foods due to smell.
• Refuses to go into certain rooms because of odors.

🎯 How to help:

• Use unscented soaps and detergents.
• Let them smell food first before eating.
• Keep rooms well-ventilated.

6. Vestibular (Movement Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Gets car sick often.
• Avoids swings, slides, or climbing activities.
• Becomes anxious with sudden movement.

🎯 How to help:

• Let them sit in the front seat of the car.
• Give gentle movement activities (rocking, slow swinging).
• Avoid spinning or fast movements.

7. Proprioceptive (Body Awareness Sensitivity)

🚨 Signs of sensitivity:

• Complains about “tight” or “loose” clothes.
• Needs deep pressure (hugs, weighted blankets).
• Feels uncomfortable with certain movements.

🎯 How to help:

• Offer compression clothing or weighted blankets.
• Give deep-pressure hugs when they need grounding.
• Allow safe movement activities (pushing, pulling, carrying objects). 

How to Make Daily Routines Easier

Now that you understand why your child resists things, here’s how to help them.

1. Meet Their Sensory Needs First

• If your child struggles with sound, offer noise-canceling headphones before going to a loud place.
• If they struggle with touch, let them pick their own soft clothes.
• If food is an issue, serve safe foods they feel comfortable with.

When kids feel safe in their environment, they naturally cooperate more.

2. Use Predictability & Choice

• Create visual schedules so they know what’s coming next.
• Offer choices:
• “Do you want the red shirt or the blue shirt?”
• “Do you want to brush your teeth before or after your bath?”

When kids feel in control, they resist less.

3. Stay Calm & Supportive

• If your child refuses something, don’t force it. Instead, acknowledge their feelings:
• “I know that toothpaste feels weird. Let’s find one that works better for you.”
• Stay patient—small changes over time lead to big progress.

What If You Struggle With Staying Calm?

If you’re thinking, “This makes sense, but I still lose my patience when my child refuses things,” I get it.

You’re doing your best. But when you’re overwhelmed, it’s hard to stay calm.

That’s why I created a free class to help parents like you break free from angry reactions and start responding with confidence.

In this free class, you’ll learn:

✅ How to stop reactive parenting and stay calm—no matter what.
✅ How to communicate so your child actually listens—even when you say ‘no.’
✅ How to raise emotionally secure kids who feel safe, respected, and heard.

🎉 Sign up for the free class here 

Final Thoughts

Your child isn’t being difficult on purpose.

They just experience the world differently.

When you meet their sensory needs first, daily routines become easier—with less frustration and more connection.

💡 Now, share this with another parent who needs this. Let’s make life easier for all of us.

And remember, it only takes understanding your child’s needs to raise secure kids.

🚀 Sign up for the free class now 

You’ve got this! 💛