Epi #83. Parenting Without Fear: Making Sure Our Children Always Trust Us
Oct 24, 2023
Parenting Without Fear: Making Sure Our Children Always Trust Us
Ever had that niggling worry in the back of your mind? The one that whispers, "Did I shout too much today? Will my kiddo start fearing me?"
Oh, believe me, you're not alone! Let's take a deep dive into this world of trust and understanding.
- Decoding the Parenting Fear Factor
Alright, here's the deal. That sinking feeling kicks in every time we lose our cool and raise our voices higher than usual.
But here's the kicker: Our freak-outs often come from these wild, overblown thoughts. "Oh no, they smacked their sibling! Will they grow up to be aggressive?" Sound familiar?
In HIC Parenting coaching, the first thing we do with our clients is sift through these fears, bring them into the light, and shift the narratives!
Because when those fear goggles are off, you see moments with your kids for the pure, raw, and beautiful interactions they are.
- Predictability and Empathy: The Dynamic Duo
So, here's the secret sauce to fearless parenting: Be the parent your child knows they can count on.
They'll trust you more when they're sure your reactions are predictable and empathetic, no matter their behavior.
- Relationship Goals vs. My-Way-or-The-Highway
It's all about cherishing that heart-to-heart bond with your little one more than any to-do list or agenda.
Because, at the end of the day, when the toys are put away and the bedtime stories are read, our children will always cherish in their hearts how we made them feel that day, and that's what matters.
- Out With The Old, In With The Understanding
Let's play pretend and toss out those ancient "because I said so" discipline tricks. Let's swap them with some understanding of their needs. That's all about listening, learning, and loads of love.
No child learns how to do better by feeling bad about themselves. They do better when they feel better.
- Your Children's Truth Zone
Imagine a world where your child can come up to you, teary-eyed or giggling, and just be themselves.
No judgment, no shame. Just pure, unadulterated trust.
Children will start trusting their parents when they know they can tell them anything, and they won't come back at them with shame, blame, or projection.
-Shame, "You always drop things; be more careful next time."
-Blame, "I would not have yelled if you would have listened to me."
-Projection, "I would have been spanked if I did what you did."
- Because... Little Voices Matter BIG Time!
Children will trust us with their things when they grow up, feeling their voice matter.
If we listen to them and acknowledge their point of view when they are small, as a teen, they will naturally come to us because we created that pattern of trust.
Every day, we are seeding our future relationship with our children. If we seed trust, empathy, and healthy communication, then that is what we will reap when they become young adults.
There's so much more to unpack!
For real-life examples of how to build trust with our children, tune into the full episode on the Parenting With Understanding Podcast.
If you prefer personalized guidance, then I encourage you to CLICK HERE to apply for a free Parent Assessment call where you are going to get three things:
- We will get to the root of what's going on in your parenting
- You will get a step-by-step roadmap to break free from frustration and bring more peace to your home
- We will show you how our HIC Parenting coaching services could support you in reaching your parenting goals way more quickly than on your own.
