Epi #91. Navigating Parental Criticism with Grace: A Gentle Parent's Guide
Dec 19, 2023
Navigating Parental Criticism with Grace: A Gentle Parent's Guide
Embarking on the journey of gentle parenting, I found myself in unfamiliar waters, especially when it came to handling criticism from family members like my mother-in-law.
The advice to be more strict or even resort to spanking was hard to counter, given my lack of confidence in my newfound parenting approach.
The fear of my children acting out in public and not knowing how to handle it added to my stress.
However, over the past decade, I’ve learned to navigate these challenges confidently.
Here's how I transformed my approach to face and overcome criticism.
- Embracing My Transformation:
The first step in my journey was confronting my people-pleasing nature.
I often found myself excusing my children's actions or raising my voice to appease others, followed by guilt.
This pattern was a vestige of my upbringing, and I realized that to truly embrace gentle parenting, I needed to be comfortable with disappointing others for the sake of my children's well-being.
The realization came from reflecting on my own childhood experiences and desiring to provide a different upbringing for my children.
- Establish your Priorities:
I recall a specific incident at my aunt's house where my three-year-old son was being too rough with her dog.
As my aunt scolded him harshly, I felt a surge of anger.
However, I chose not to escalate the situation. Instead, I gently intervened, calmed my son, and later taught him how to pet the dog properly.
This incident highlighted the importance of prioritizing my child's emotional needs over immediate adult reactions.
It taught me the value of separating adult conflicts from a child’s learning moments.
I talked to my aunt afterward, but my child was not part of it.
- Setting Expectations with Relatives:
Another significant change was learning to set clear expectations with family members, especially those who babysit my children.
For instance, my mother-in-law, who believed in physical discipline, needed to understand my boundaries regarding my parenting style.
I approached this by setting clear instructions, like asking her to wait for me to handle any disciplinary actions she deemed necessary.
This approach avoided philosophical debates and focused on practical steps, respecting her beliefs while upholding my own.
The journey of gentle parenting, especially in the face of criticism, is one of personal growth and confidence-building.
By prioritizing my children's needs, setting clear expectations with relatives, and embracing my role as a gentle parent, I’ve found a harmonious balance.
This approach has not only benefited my relationship with my children but also strengthened my resolve to face external criticisms.
Remember, every gentle parent’s journey is unique. It’s about finding your path and confidently walking it, regardless of others' opinions.
Embrace your parenting style with confidence, and watch as it transforms not just your children's lives but yours as well.
For more insights and support on your gentle parenting journey, listen to our latest episode on The Parenting With Understanding™️ Podcast. Join us as we delve deeper into real-life stories and strategies for thriving amidst criticism.
Your Personal Parenting Guide:
If you’re seeking personalized support, we invite you to book a free Parenting Assessment Call with us at HIC Parenting Education.
-So you can get clear about what is going on in your parenting so you can unveil the root of your struggles.
-So you can get a clear path tailored to your needs
-So you can decide if you want to work with us as a coaching client.
Let us guide you on your journey to raising emotionally healthy children with understanding and confidence.
